today 11/5,. Tuesday i mean,.
nothing particular, but today quite tiring.
first lesson was EDPR, from 8 to 12 p.m
nothing particular happen, but when i went into the class the teacher announced that i had 3 times consecutive of being late,.
what an honor to say,. haha
today most likely only doing soldering,.
totally suck at practical but overall quite fun also,.

after that i got 3 hours break, as usual went back home first,.
need to bring my shoes bag and laptop,.
well usually for my next lesson was elective, DAVE module,.
and last week our teacher announced that we need to bring laptop cause we have quiz on mel..
so i brought along with my shoes bag.
but damn unlucky, during our elective lesson, teacher told us that the MEL got some problem, no idea what is the problem, but she said we can conduct the quiz,.
so totally crap, like bring laptop for nothing,.
not quite truth since at class, I was doing MOL for my EM3,.

as for my CCA tchoukball,.
indeed today thank to the rain and made us do PT, physical training.
damn kenny, as our coach,.
he seems like to enjoy torturing us,.
cant help, since it was raining and our usual court was outdoor not indoor,.
indeed quite tiring,.
reach home around 10.30 p.m,.
then watch Korean show,.

23 April,.
another new semester had started,.
a bit relieved since my new class had someone i known, either from first or second semester,.
like hell, every Monday really boring to the max,.
since all the day from 8 a.m to 5 p.m lecture-lecture and lecture..
there are some new modules, but hell you, APPG..
at first i really don't know how to do, all my friends could finish their lab 1 without any difficulty, as for me not even understand and how to make it..
really suck at programming,.
what push me, what button me,. I even couldn't create a box out and also a lot of thing, i think really need to practice for this module already,.
since i haven't bought APPG book yet, as out of stock..

for some reason, I'm getting quite screw up,.
as yesterday around our break, went to canteen 2 for my lunch.
at there i help my friend buy and same goes to my friend,.
we went to the stall and order the food
i really freak plus old, both meals cost 5 dollars, but i don't have any change so i just gave them 50 dollars note, but for some reason i forgot to take the changes and walk away,
like went to sit around 5 minutes then I just realize i haven't retrieve any change, so i went to the stall and said i haven't got the changes,.
but they said never receive any 50 dollars notes,. they said i gave them 10 dollars not 50..
can't argue with them since i don't have any proof,.
but i show them my wallet, only have 2 dollar and 50 dollar notes,.
then just where was my 5 dollars note, since they said i pay 10 dollars note for my meals,. they kept saying never receive 50 dollars note,.
pathetic !! freak me !!
why always so careless..
I'm not acting cool or what,. losing 50 dollars just for 1 ---------, totally upset,.
i thought they would return me the money, but hell no.. they even said not even receive any 50 dollars note , quite pathethic.. hopeless me,. can't even argue and retrieve back,. angry ttm !

time table out,
as my friend told me and ask me what is my class?
i quickly check and found out that i was at P2B6..
B6 again, haiz..
not so happy, since somebody not there, kidding2xz..
well, some people that i dislike same class as me, found it quite depressed.
but still have some happy thing,.
got 2 friends from my last last friends same class as me,.
quite good,. haha.
nvm, good point as have new friends,.
bad one is, I'm not quite good at making a new friends,. :)

15 march, when to my friend house, hedy,
he stays at hougang, but i dont know his condo name,. haha
i reach there around 2, then we went to have our lunch at kopitiam, near the hougang mall there.
after that we went to hougang mall first,
he said he wanna went to popular and bought some books.
and also we went to sport shop and bought table tennis balls,
reach his house around 3,
i saw his bro, his bro girlfriend and his sister.
he also same condition as me, only live by ourselves,.
then he took out PS2 and we played winning games, ( soccer ).
we play around 1 hour plus, then prepare to go down and have some real sport.
we play table tennis, as we just bought a new ball,
i really quite enjoy this sport cause i had already played for 2 years plus,.
so a bit skillful,. :)
we play around 1 hour, it was quite fun, i really enjoyed it..
but my hand damn pain, cause swing too much,. :)
there was something quite tiring was going back,
cause from hougang mrt to lakeside mrt, around 1 hour route, really tiring since i just finished my sport,.
but quite fun, and thx to him,. hope we can play again soon.

In this dream, a girl I have never seen before sat right next to me. For some unknown reason, I like this girl very much, and she kinds of likes me too. However, when the dream is about to end, that girls just vanished into the sky. And I would find myself crying, as I wake from the dream.

7 march
going JP with my family, ate lunch together
then went to OCBC bank to pay some bills and deposit money ($).
then around afternoon i went out with my friend,
we went to marina square, cause he said wanna play billiards.
after that we went to shop.
and we ate MC donalds as for our dinner.
we finished at 7, then since we rarely went home so early,
usually we went home around 10 plus or 11.
then we went to Explanade and sat at the so called concert area,.
listening to the music from some unknown bands and rockers..
quite noisy but i enjoyed and really hyper.
after that we planned to walk to flyer, since i haven't went there yet.
from explanade to flyer, or call marina leisure park, if i'm not wrong.
need to walk around 10 - 15 minutes.
since it was at night time, so we could feel the wind blow plus the cold air.

at first i thought the flyer was surrounded by the huge grassland.
but i was wrong, the flyer was built and surrounded with a building,
look like a stadium but its smaller compare to a real stadium.
at there got a lot of cafe and restaurants.
we explored that area around half and hour,
but i like the view man, cause it was located near the sea and
surrounded with colourful light, dazzling plus radiant, really amazed.
really was romantic place for those couple who want to sit and enjoy their lovely time at there,. :)
after we finished exploring then walked back to where we came from
reaching marina square around 9 plus,
but really tiring plus my leg damn pain. :(
some more nothing to do already then we walk to the MRT and went back home,.

Fear, an emotion aroused by impending danger, upset,..
Pain, physical suffering due to injury or illness,.
both emotion cause a man to lose their heart's beating and soul.

The biggest weapon that causes a man to fell is feeling.
not by hurting to your body, just a few words can totally shattered your feeling.
It's will take a period of time to heal your wound.
but this feeling won't be vanished so easily.
all your mind will keep thinking why, why and why.
The more you think, the deeper its hurts, and the shallow the wound,
and it will remain forever.

until the day you revived,
bringing up your courage,
and be brave to face it.
No matter how hard the wall,
one day it still will collapse.

but I'm still unable to forgive myself,
you can't forget something so easily which make your heart beating.
hiding, maybe a perfect plan from now,
but i will keep watching you,
watching over you in secret
waiting,
and protecting.
day by day,
This feeling will either grow or vanish from my heart.
Until the day, i understand this meaning,
you will be the first to know my true feeling.

These few days, i had thought a lot of things.
No matter what i did to her, nothing will change.
our conversation become short
the time we spent become lesser
and both of us seem busy during holiday

I was once sensitive and fragile
with an answer of NO
everything my hope and chance were vanished
consider myself unlucky
sometime i was very selfish
never consider her feeling and spout something nonsense out,
leading both of us felt upset.
Feeling of jealousy was killing me
perhaps she didn't have this kind of feeling.
and i knew that she won't, cause i long ago know her feeling already.
time flows really fast, i had this kind of feeling for 3 months
still nothing change
maybe, this nothing change mean good thing to me
there a big obstacle about this matter,
she already belong to the other.

These few days,
our distance become further and further
i think this kind of feeling will vanish really soon.
no matter how strong and stubborn my heart,
one day it's still will collapse.
When protection become belief,
tears will even turn sweet.

25 feb
after wake up, i felt a little bit dizzy
i thought maybe i slept too long already.
then around afternoon, i just found out that im sick.
i took out my thermometer and measured it.
really lucky, 37.8 c.
dont know what happen to me, but indeed lucky, im sick.
felt really tired and went to rest.
sleep around 2 hours plus then wake up,
but more worse, my head kept spinning and it's heavy,
my body kept sweating and some more sneezing.
jia lat, alone at home nobody can take care of me.
need to take care by myself already.
usually i lived with my sisters,
but my sisters went back cause they were having holiday
and left me alone here, at singapore.
then i all the day ate cup noodles.
poor me, :(

20 feb
that time was the first time she ate together with me,
usually i ate alone, she just sat in beside me and saw me eating.
but today special, cause usually she on week days, monday to thursday she need to go back to eat her dinner.
and god really help me,
cause 20 feb is on saturday, so her mom usually never cook on weekends.
so she need to eat outside,
then Im the lucky guy, can eat lunch with her some more
then we went to swensen.
after that i sent her backkkkk..
i really enjoy it. thx for giving me this chance. :)

19 feb - EG2 paper
20 feb - AEL paper
24 feb - DEL paper and so called last paper..
after that holiday START.. wkakakaka..
Guys good luck for the exams..
and tomorrow last paper, don't think it will quiet easy manxz..
so study hard.. :)
cause i also need to revise, so you all also NEED,, haha

before the DEL paper, i think on Monday..
i think my butt like being glue with the chair, all day just sitting on the chair and practicing revisions..
from 1 pm start doing, doing, doing, doing, doing,. until around 6 like that
then went to rest, went to bath and bought my dinner..
ate really fast, then continue to study around 7 to 10+..
i like a robot like that, kept continuing study, unstoppable..
bo bian, in order to get a good results,
so need to study hard.
i like spent around 10 hours like to study DEL,
but after i did all the revisions, total got 5 papers,
there are still some questions that i left blank,
cause i don't know how to do so left it.
i think this semester, all the lecture class taught us really ( can understand 50-50 ), so must do revision then i could understand and applied the formula on the questions.

today, Tuesday, got a DEL clinic, a lesson for us.
so i went there, cause i did my revisions already but some questions i couldn't understand so need to seek for the teacher help..
i think total got 7 or 8 questions like that.
but after hearing, our teacher explain the answer, like DAMN easy,
she just speaks a few words and writes something on my paper, then can get the answer already, for her was easy, but for me, HARD..
some i really don't understand so i kept asking her again and again,
and finally i catch her meaning and understand already..
im really glad that i come today,
if not then at home will like a stone,
and wait for the god to give me the answer, by dropping from the sky.,.
so really thx a lot to teacher..
all the best for tomorrow paper guys,.
don't emo or sad, cause the paper is hard,
relax a bit like me, smile and cheer up k..
so you can do it manxz..

19 february
EG2 paper, not so difficult, but too many careless mistakes.. :(
sian, cant get AD ler, haha..
but at least can get an A, better than get B..
after exam, around 11 a.m, me, jakcson, guo wei and the others plan to study AEL for tomorrow test.
we went to our space to study, but i at there like nothing to study too.
cause i have revised AEL for many times alr,.
so can say that im very confident for this paper.. :D
we finish study around 3 plus, then my friend ask me to go out town,.
then i like,.. erm,,. felt happy..
then i took the same bus with she, we went to bishan..
but that time really damn happy, cause we like keeping argue about something,.
one is about her spectacles and another one is about the bubble tea..
haiz, she arh, really stubborn arh,,
first is about the her specs, cause i stole her spec..
usually she wears contact lens, but dont know why she wears spec..
she said her eyes 'Zhong' haha,
yup, i saw it and agree about it.
then, i kept her spec, she kept trying and trying to steal it back..
she will use any kind of methods,.
no matter what she tried, she still cant success,.
but, i ownself gave up, so i surrender to her, give her back. :)
its quiet fun to be like this with her..

for second one is about money,
cause i said i thirsty and i said i wanna buy a drink
so we went to the bubble tea shop, near her house their..
she drinks milk shake and i drink green apple milk shake..
then i said i pay for her, but i said i treat her.
no matter what i said, she die die also dont want me to play for her..
walking with her also very scared, must have a distance with her,
maybe she like a monster or what, haha..
but, at last she gave up, cause she lose to me alr, and tired bah..
so yup, i think really enjoy it very much..
really hope can be like this with her every times and days..

sorry, until now i only thought about myself never thought about you..
you have your difficulties but i still cant understand you..
cause when i talk to you, i hope you can happy chat with me,
and don't do other think can?
just enjoy talk to me..
i knew you very hard, cause your father will angry because of it..
exams is coming soon,
if you still haven prepared for it,
your father will confirm angry about you, or even can scold you..
and like that your grade may fell too...
then you just blame me ok.
cause im the one making you become like that.
today is the last day at school,
and i hope can spend with you until i left singapore.
but i think cant.
cause we have an argument just now.
Im really sorry for your old man and you..
after you text me, i read ler, i felt sad.
then after that i cant sleep alr
cause i 4.30 need to wake up, and need to prepare something also.
so yup, and this time not your fault, is entirely my fault..
so blame me ok!
i really upset after read your msg..
i think i won't be happy after today.
even going back, meet my friend, enjoy CNY with my family,
i also wont be happy.. because i did something that made you sad.
i dont know you got read my blog or not.
really sorry and this time really my fault for not understanding your difficulties........... :(

Compro quiz, i score quite good at MCQ, and second part,
i think quite ok too..
and thx to one girl...
because of her, i can score quite good on my MCQ.
so yup thx to her, :)
today, something special,.
jx talk to me first, i stunned..
maybe that girl treat her good what, or what..
even chu han aslo ask me, said jx change alot..
like suddenly start talking with them..

dont know why, during the compro test,.
i proud of it..
cause after i finish my part 2,.
i shout it out and said i had done..
and a lot of people copied mine.. haha..
so yup, maybe they proud of my answer or what..

and to this baka girl..
dont sad ok cause of your MCQ result,.
at least, you did your best alr, and second part you also did quite ok..
and sorry for not helping you, :(
so don't sad ok, you just unlucky or what..
cheer up!! don't sad cause i also will sad,. :(

today, i really felt alone.
after class ended at 5 pm, as usual i wait for them.
my next door class friend, tchouk-ball friend..
then i wait outside for them around 30 minutes,.
because i never ask them or even said hi to them,
just being alone, stand outside, kept daydreaming.. :)
nvm, i really being alone long time ago alr..
so somehow get used to it..
after they finished, we walked to the canteen 2..
and some more i ask them wanna eat or not..
none of them reply me, only hansen..
but he said he full alr..
i dont know why..
they went to buy drink never ask me..
buy food also never asked me..
i really dont know why..
around 45 minutes like that, none of them talk to me..
like can't even communicate with them,.
sitting alone and keep having day dreaming..

after all, after that incident, i realized something
maybe they even not care for me at all..
to them i like stranger.. :(

really regret now..
why i have to take this kind of elective course..
up until now, more than 4 months, totally dont understand at all..
about today test.. haiz
first time in my life, during the exam never even write a single answer..
i think most likely maximum score i can get is only 5 mark out of 40..
really hopeless..
even i got time to study and revise,,
but i still can't understand at all..
the weight of this test is 15%..
never mind it ends already so gave up bah..
cause i had done my final project, the weight is 50%..
so hopefully can pass.
really regret, cause i didn't choose this module..
and who the hell so good and help me choose this stupid module..
but never mind, today is the LAST day of my stupid elective class..
so hopefully, don't ever show up in front of me thx..

today, that guy really ....
need to hit him.. haiz..

after finished my lunch at the MC donald, my friend plan to walk back to NP through back door.
at the front line got 2 girls, mid got 3 and,
last, i mean behind have 2 'so called couple'.

but, i really hate that weird person..
keep following me and foo..
i just wanted to have a more free time with her..
however, that weirdo kept following me..
he really dont know that i want to be alone with her,
or he just act blur.. really piss me off..
then i really dont care..

but he did it one more time..
after we end our lesson..
she need to meet her sister so i accompany him, and also 2 of my friends,
included that weirdo..
one of my friend knew me well, so he kept a distance with me,.
but that weirdo, haiz..
when i was walking with her, he kept trying to sneak to the middle and want to have a conversation with her..
then i felt confuse..
like he suddenly bump in for???
really, he need to get beaten by me..
one day,, you better be careful weirdo...